As usual, when you are doing things the conventional way – aka making a movie in a company town like LA – there are lots of people you have to pay off before you can get to actually doing your art. I just found out that I need to have MORE insurance (insurance that I shouldn’t actually NEED to film dialogue scenes, on a closed studio lot where there are no guns or pyrotechnics) on the location I fought for and paid for last year. More money… Now I understand why the FATES have blessed me with a Kickstarter campaign that is actually doing well, because I’m probably gonna need every penny and then some.
It’s a drag to realize that no matter how carefully I get my ducks in a row, something or someone could always move the target.
But today was also a good day, because a box of props we need for our two clinic days arrived and I got giddy as a school girl all over again. (Who knew you could just order this sh*t online?!) And I got nervous and excited, because this is really going to happen. Because no matter how many times the rug gets pulled from under me… And no matter how many times the cost challenges resurface… And no matter how many times I have to rebuild a day from the ground up, leaving me no choice but to carpet bomb my beautiful, patience cast and crew with “heads up” emails… I can still see the end. There are fewer days behind us than days before us. I can let go of all the things I had in place and taken care of in the beginning, because many of those seeds have dissolved into careless whispers in a stream of unbroken promise; and the FATES have replaced them with something better, someone better, slowly coming into focus, the closer we get to the end.
Exciting things are afoot for our “little film that can will.”